Beaver Anal Excretions Are All Over You, And In You

DID YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAVE EATEN BEAVER ANAL EXCRETIONS, RUBBED THEM ON YOUR BODY?

So busy as a beaver. That’s a saying, because beavers never stop moving, working. Or so it seems. But did you know that beavers are a source for things that are all up in your life? Or, rather, all over it and around it? Well, they are. Or, beaver anal excretions are, anyway. So if that sounds gross well, it kind of is. But it’s totally true. Though I’m now hesitant to think about what else we didn’t know. I suspect it’s a lot. Like, a lot. But hey, we’re really talking about the chemical castoreum.

BEAVER ANAL EXCRETIONS? YES, WE CALL IT CASTOREUM, AND IT’S IN EVERYTHING

Castoreum, you say? What the hell is that? Well, it’s a fair question. The short answer is that it’s a chemical that comes out of beaver behinds. Yes, that’s right, castoreum is an anal excretion. That is, it comes out of glands in beavers’ anuses. And as it turns out, we use castoreum in all sorts of things. And it’s quite the range. I doubt I’m finding all of them to include here. But to start, you know that artificial vanilla flavoring? Well, that comes from castoreum. Yes, from beaver anal excretions. Eww, right?

GOT ANXIETY ABOUT BEAVER ANAL EXCRETIONS? WELL, THE CAUSE IS THE CURE, TOO

But there is of course more. Besides being an FDA legitimate food additive, castoreum is so much more than that. But first, feel a little reassurance, here. It’s expensive to get, um, anal beaver excretions, so it’s not in every candy bar you stick in your mouth. But if you have ever turned to homeopathic solutions for anxiety, insomnia or menstrual cramps, you’ve likely already had some beaver anal excretions in you. No, this is no joke. Oh, and let’s not forget that castoreum is a common ingredient in perfumes….. Beaver anal excretions are, and have been, a part of our lives for a long time.

But don’t get to anxious about it. It could create an ugly cycle. And no one is an eager beaver for that.