VIAGRA LEAVES RUSSIA IN FLACCID LURCH, AS PUTIN RAMPS UP LOCAL ED MEDS PRODUCTION
Poor Russia. Yet another major company has stopped production of its products there with the war in Ukraine continuing with no end in sight. This time Viatris, which manufactures Viagra, is halting all production of the ED med in tablet form. But as Russia is a gung ho masculine wasteland led by the often shirtless Vladimir Putin, something has to be done to ensure erect penises on aging Russian men, especially as things get more challenging. So Russia is ramping up its own production of ED meds to “compensate.” It’s harder to establish male ardor when the emperor has no clothes.
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NO LESS THAN 36 RUSSIAN COMPANIES SET TO PRODUCE ED MEDS AS DEMAND LEAPS AND BOUNDS
Sorry, that’s a bit of a non-binary visual, there. But for the Russians, clearly something had to be done. As one person eloquently put it on Twitter, “No more Viagra in limp dick Mordor.” So Russia’s Industry and Trade Ministry has taken steps to allow domestic production of generic forms of Viagra, giving 36 local companies registration certificates to produce sildenafil. And clearly there is a market for ED meds in Russia these days. As phalluses flag in the gulag, the only thing that has gone up in Russia is demand for ED meds. Way, way up.
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RUSSIAN DEMAND FOR ED MEDS TO FIX LIMP DICK SYNDROME SKYROCKET 88% IN A SINGLE YEAR
What does way, way up mean? It means that Russian men purchased 88% more ED meds from July to September 2022 that the same period in 2021. And the cost went up by 75% as well. It’s hard to be, well, hard in such nationalistic patriarchal circumcisions- I mean, circumstances. But demand for ED meds is certainly very real in Russia these days. Sure, it’s in demand pretty much everywhere. But who else saw an 88% jump in demand in a single year, only to have the manufacturer take their erstwhile ball and go home?
It’s enough to make Vodka taste almost good Luke warm.
